Guilt-Free Getaway, Almost!

 

Hey there, fellow warriors in the trenches of parenthood! I’m just a 41-year-old entrepreneur, mama to a pack of five amazing (and incredibly energetic) boys aged 2 to 11, you know, a slow, simple life. NOT!

We’re a family that thrives on adventure – think mud puddles over manicures, bike rides instead of ballet class. My partner, Papi, is the ultimate co-pilot, always up for a spontaneous hike or a backyard wrestling match.

But let’s be honest, even the most chaos-loving mama needs a break sometimes. Recently, the exhaustion gremlins were whispering a little too loudly, and I knew it was time for a recharge. But here’s the thing: how do you sneak away with your partner leaving a house full of miniature whirlwinds for four glorious days without succumbing to a mountain of guilt?

The short answer is… you don’t! But I have found a way to almost enjoy a guilt-free getaway with Luis, almost. Here are some of my secrets to creating an epic experience for our boys even if we’re not there:

 

The Multigenerational Village

Forget the “single sitter” route. For five boys, we needed a cavalry. Step in, my amazing tribe!

• Mimi: Poor Jack (2) rarely gets to live the life of a true toddler. He is dragged from one baseball game to the next, attends birthday parties for big kids, and sometimes we forget that he just wants to play blocks or read board books one on one. So we called in my amazing mom, Mimi, who spent four amazing days just letting Jack be the curious, loving and fun toddler that he is.
• Sissy: While most families don’t get to enjoy much older siblings, lucky for Jasper (8) and Mateo (6), they have the most amazing big sister! She lives 3 hours away, but being a 20-something young woman, she is mature enough to care for them for days (or even weeks!) at a time, she is also young and fun enough to orchestrate the most amazing adventures at her house, including 4-wheelers, farm lands, and even more family time.
• Ex’s: OK, being a blended family is tough, and most times it’s hard to “share” your children even if you know how important it is for them. But in times like this, being a blended family does lighten the load knowing that MJ (11) and Matthew (8) got to spend their time with their dad and his family while I was away.

So instead of leaving one person to care for 5 crazy, energic boys, which would leave her stressed out and them missing Mama and Papi, enlisting the help of everyone in our village gives us the peace of mind to know that the boys are getting tailored, intentional and loving quality time.

 

The Art of the Facetime

Some parents may feel like they need to connect with their children daily, or even multiple times throughout the day, and that works for them. But for us, we have learned that interrupting the fun both knock them off track of their fun activity but it can instigate the “I miss you!” sadness that wouldn’t happen if we had just skipped the call.

So we learned the art of giving the boys what they need, not what we need. Jack loved one quick FaceTime call to show me the Christmas decorations that he had done with Mimi. MJ and Matthew love our nightly calls so they can tell me about their day. Jasper and Mateo… well they have so much fun with Sissy that they forget we haven’t called at all! It really depends on the individual child, figuring out what they need, and abiding by that. Even when your own Mom heart wants to call them constantly!

 

The Power of “We Missed You” Gifts

Ok, we are very much “experience” gifters. We prioritize bringing the boys to new places, trying new things and going on adventures over buying them material gifts. But, when we travel without them, we like to come back with small, personalized gifts for each boy. A cool scorpion fossi   l in a rock bracelet for one of the boys, a skull necklace or a Maui hook necklace for another. Finding just the right gift made them feel loved and missed while we were gone while it also connected them to our trip and gave them a little treasure to remember their own experiences while we were gone.

 

The Grand Reunion

When we walked back in the door, the house exploded in hugs and a cacophony of excited stories. There were tales of Christmas lights, hotel experiences, and the world’s best treats (courtesy of Grandmama, of course).

Honestly, hearing them recount their adventures made us realize something important: while they had an amazing time, they also missed us – just as much as we missed them. It was a beautiful reminder that even though we crave those “adult only” moments, the bond we share with our little guys is unshakeable.

 

Lessons Learned

Taking a break from the chaos isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. A rejuvenated mama is a more patient, playful mama. By creating a well-planned getaway with the help of loved ones, we not only gave ourselves a break but also ensured our boys had an unforgettable experience. That’s a win-win for everyone.

Here are some final takeaways for your own guilt-free getaway plan:

• Don’t underestimate the power of planning. A detailed plan for care, and an itinerary for fun for the kids will give everyone peace of mind.
• Involve the kids in the process. Let them help choose activities and pack their bags. It builds excitement and makes them feel like part of the adventure.
• Trust your village. Let go of the need to control everything. Your loved ones want to help, so let them!
• Set boundaries with technology. While daily check-ins are great, limit screen time to preserve the magic of their moments.
• Be present when you’re present. When you’re with your kids, put away your phone and truly connect. They’ll remember those moments more than anything else, not the 4 days you were catching your breath.

Remember, a guilt-free getaway isn’t just a luxury, it’s an investment in your well-being. By following these tips, you can enjoy a much-needed break knowing that your little tribe is thriving in your absence. So go ahead, book that trip, recharge your soul, and come back ready to conquer the chaos with renewed energy and love.